I’m Indonesian but grew up in Europe, and my partner is very obviously white. We’re in Yogyakarta right now and it feels like we’re getting targeted constantly.
The obvious stuff I expected. Batik “exhibitions,” overpriced tuk tuk rides when it’s hot and you’re tired, fine. But what’s really wearing me down is how almost every friendly conversation turns into a setup. Someone always knows a chef at the palace, a university professor, an artist, or a “special” wayang place we absolutely have to visit. It’s just nonstop.
My Bahasa Indonesia is limited and the local languages make it even harder to really connect, which already makes me feel a bit out of place in my own country. Today was the breaking point when I heard two saleswomen laughing about my partner after he paid 10x the local price for a piece of clothing. Yes, the price was still affordable for us, and no, I didn’t confront them, I get the economic reality. But hearing them mock us after was just… painful.
I feel stupid, exploited, and like I have to keep my guard up all the time. I expected this in places like Egypt, but I honestly didn’t think it would feel this bad in Yogya. It’s making it really hard to enjoy the genuine interactions I was so excited about when finally visiting “my” country.
Not really asking for solutions, just needed to vent and see if others have felt the same way here.
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