Yeah this situation always feels off… host wants you to cancel so they don’t get penalized, but you’re the one taking the risk.
The fact Booking already approved “free cancellation” because of the host is actually a good sign. That usually means you should get your money back, not just lose it.
I definitely wouldn’t send bank details directly to the host. That’s a red flag.
If it were me, I’d accept the free cancellation through Booking (not manually cancel outside of it), and keep everything documented. Booking normally processes the refund once it’s cancelled under those conditions.
Still annoying though… especially this close to the trip
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